Watching the movies "Kung Fu Panda", "Dr. Strange" and "Hikayat Merong Mahawangsa" over the past few days brought back pleasant memories of my relationship with my gurus Supramania Swami of Tiruvannamalai and Tavayogi Thangarasan Adigal of Kallar Ashram. The former was a family man till his last days while the latter left his family to serve Agathiyar adorning the saffron robes. While the former's 40-year-old desire to build a temple for Lord Murugan in Tiruvannamalai was stopped abruptly by the divine forces, the latter completed his desire to build a temple/ashram and meditation hall in Kallar. Who can comprehend the play of the Divine?
I adored the scenes in the above movies where the aspirant meets the guru and subsequently is accepted and trained in the mystic arts and art forms of self-defense. I was blessed to have similar experiences. Then these movies reminded me of disciples who betrayed the gurus and turn against them. We have Tai Lung, Kaecilius, and Taji from the respective movies deceive their gurus and turn traitors. I have seen my fair share of such followers and disciples who turned against my guru too. Why did they fall out of favor?
In my search to learn about the worship of the Siddhas prior to meeting my gurus, I used to wonder why was there a need for so many centers? Why couldn't they come under a single umbrella? I was to find out soon that each individual's ego, be it the student or master alike, just like in the material world, now stood before them hijacking their ability in making decisions related to religious and spiritual matters. It is difficult to come by a student or master who is devoid of ego. One who fills this description would make decisions in the interest and for the good of all mankind. These experiences held me back from patronizing these centers. It never dawned on me to start another mission or center, either.
But Agathiyar had other plans for me. He had a youth come over to my home to participate in my family Full Moon Puja after his Nadi reading. He in turn brought his schoolmates both to the Nadi reader and have them come over to join in the puja. A small group of following grew to as many as 100 plus. Agathiyar Vanam Malaysia (AVM) was born. When Agathiyar got us to do charity too besides puja Amudha Surabhi (AS) took birth. Along the way, some left with no further news from them, while others remained. I guess that is life. We cannot expect a bouquet of roses without having to rid the thorns. I understand now why the gurus stringently vet through their subjects before sharing with them the secrets. Tavayogi told me that a student has to wait to be tested for some 12 years before this knowledge is imparted to them. I know now how tough it must have been for him to be a guru.
What started in 2013 was brought to an end in September 2019 by Agathiyar, just months ahead of the emergence of the Covid-19 virus. Agathiyar put a stop to both the tasks and had us stay indoors and try to meditate. Time flew by sitting in isolation, attending to only matters that were crucial to our survival and sustenance. With many having had three doses of the vaccine, those who held fast to Agathiyar through these trying years began to meet again, a family at a time or in small numbers. I had a devotee invite Agathiyar over for his housewarming ceremony to be held soon. He personally extended an invitation to Agathiyar who had told me not to move his bronze statue anywhere after the series of visits he made to the home of some 10 devotees who invited him, accompanied by Tavayogi and Mataji Sarojini Ammaiyar during their visit to Malaysia in 2016. Would he accept the devotee's invitation? Will he go on another round of visits to his devotees homes? We have to wait and see.
I, too, have come one cycle and began to carry out the homam daily in my home again. Finally, the mountain is a mountain again. We return to where we started, with our awareness and perspective changed. I thought I had to do it for the good of the world, as Agathiyar initially wanted me. I guess it is a way of repaying Agathiyar for all his kindness showered on this insignificant sinner. It is then the time to guide other seekers too. I have simplified even further the puja from the original 356 pages that took 2-hours initially, to accommodate those on the run with a later edition that took some 24 minutes, that today is only 12 pages. It hardly requires 12 minutes of our time. It shall be suitable to those who are hard-pressed for time and cannot sit for long periods of time. Time, the number of repetitions, and the pronunciations are not a matter of concern to the Siddhas. What is important is that we sit to do it sincerely. What is important is that we invite them into our homes first and later into the cave inside our hearts. Once they step inside, the heart shall mellow. This mellowing is the start of our spiritual journey, moving away from the initial rituals that are part and parcel of the journey.
Listening to Ramalinga Adigal's song "Mahadevamaalai" I could see the humility in him and his gratitude to his Lord.
We are told that Kanchi Periyavar too was humble to the core. Both my gurus were humble too.
Listening again to my old-time favorites I was amazed at the lines penned by Na. Muthu Kumar where he writes that the shadows of the trees under which lovers sat and that stood witness to their love were asking where was she?
நினைத்து நினைத்து பார்த்தேன் நெருங்கி விலகி நடந்தேன் உன்னால் தானே நானே வாழ்கிறேன் ஓஹோ உன்னில் இன்று என்னை பார்க்கிறேன்
எடுத்து படித்து முடிக்கும் முன்னே எரியும் கடிதம் எதற்கு பெண்ணே
உன்னால் தானே நானே வாழ்கிறேன் ஓஹோ உன்னில் இன்று என்னை பார்க்கிறேன்
அமர்ந்து பேசும் மரங்களின் நிழலும் உன்னை கேட்கும் எப்படி சொல்வேன்
உதிர்ந்து போன மலரின் மௌனமா தூது பேசும் கொலுசின் ஒளியை அறைகள் கேட்கும் எப்படி சொல்வேன் உடைந்து போன வளையல் பேசுமா உள்ளங்கையில் வெப்பம் சேர்க்கும் விரல்கள் இன்று எங்கே
தோளில் சாய்ந்து கதைகள் பேச
முகமும் இல்லை இங்கே முதல் கனவு முடிந்திடும் முன்னமே தூக்கம் கலைந்ததே
பேசி போன வார்த்தைகள் எல்லாம் காலம் தோறும் காதினில் கேட்கும்
சாம்பல் கரையும் வார்த்தை கரையுமா பார்த்து போன பார்வைகள் எல்லாம் பகலும் இரவும் கேள்விகள் கேட்கும்
உயிரும் போகும் உருவம் போகுமா தொடர்ந்து வந்த நிழலும் இங்கே
Nature stands witness to all our doings. If one observes he will realize that nature only knows how to give. On the contrary, we tend to take more of our share from her and in the process demolish her beauty and our continued sustenance. The arrogant man knows not to preserve nature but plunders her wealth as greed sets in. This is the darkness that we have to rid from us as we are told in the latest Spiderman movie. This movie reminds us too of numerous flaws we make in asking from the universe. We keep changing our prayers often adding to it. We are told the danger in tempering with fated and destined events. When Peter Parker asked Dr. Strange to go back in time and make some changes, ...
PETER
... when Mysterio revealed my identity, my entire life got screwed up. And, I was wondering... I mean, I don’t really know if this would actually work, but I was wondering if... maybe you could go back in time and make it so that he never did?
DR. STRANGE
Peter, we tampered with the stability of spacetime to resurrect countless lives. You want to do it again now just ‘cause yours got messy?
Later in casting a spell, Peter makes frequent changes to his asking and disrupts Dr. Strange. Dr. Strange reminds him that "it’s very difficult and dangerous to change it, midcasting." As Dr. Strange "works to adjust the spell" Peter interrupts again. Finally Dr. Strange tells Peter sternly "Peter, stop tampering with the spell. Let’s not change the parameters of this spell anymore while I’m casting it."
We too keep changing our needs and desires to incorporate another and another in our lives in asking for his grace and mercy. Similarly, we are reminded in a scene in Mookuthi Amman where a devotee keeps asking for more and more boons until Goddess Ma points out that man will never be satisfied, and never ask what the Gods want.
Man has many flaws that he carries. Ego is one of them. A wonderful story was shared on social media recently of how the ego of Kalidasa was trashed by the divine.
The A R R O G A N C E
After traveling long through a forest, Kalidasa reached a village. He felt very thirsty and looked around for water. He saw an old woman drawing water from a well. He went up to her and asked her for water. She agreed to give him water, but asked him to first introduce himself,
WHO ARE YOU? "Introduce yourself.”
Now Kalidasa, who was a renowned and revered scholar of his time, thought that an ordinary and old village woman was not worthy of knowing who great Kalidasa was. So he said, "I am a Traveller."
But the old lady replied, “No, you cannot be a Traveller. In this world, there are only 2 travelers – the Sun and the Moon. Both rise and set every day and keep traveling perpetually.
WHO ARE YOU?
Thirsty Kalidasa said, “Alright then, treat me as a Guest.”
The old lady promptly replied, “No you cannot be a Guest, son. In this world there are only 2 guests – Youth and Wealth … both are temporary and do not stay even if you plead with them a million times, and hence can only they be called as guests.”
WHO ARE YOU?
Thirsty but now quite intrigued with the profoundness of this old lady, Kalidasa said, “I am a Tolerant Person, mother.
Now the old lady replied, “You don’t quite look Tolerant, young man. In this world, only 2 truly know the meaning of tolerance - Bhoomi (Earth) and Tree. How much ever you stamp the earth or throw stones at the tree (for the fruits), both continue to nurture us.”
So, WHO ARE YOU?
With unquenched thirst, Kalidasa was increasingly becoming irritable. He said, “Fine then, consider me a Stubborn Person.
The lady smiled and said, “No my child, you are not that Stubborn. There are only 2 truly Stubborn personalities- our nails and our hair. We keep cutting them non-stop, but they continue to grow.”
So WHO ARE YOU?
Kalidasa had been patient so far, but now in anger, he said, “Alright, I am a Fool”.
Now the lady gave a wide smile and said, “There are only 2 kinds of fools in this world. A King who rules without having any capability or knowledge and a Minister who is a sycophant to such a King and lavishes praises on such a useless King.”
WHO ARE YOU?
Kalidasa realized that he had been outsmarted by an old illiterate village woman. In complete awe and humility, he fell at the feet of the lady, saying, “O mother! How ignorant I was to think that I know myself. I am ashamed of myself. Pardon my ignorance. Show mercy, and grant me water, I beg of you. When he touched her feet and then got up, whom did he see?... Mata Saraswati the Goddess of Learning and Wisdom.
She said, “Kalidasa, you are wise. But only if you know yourself do you become a true Manushya (human being). Your EGO has overshadowed your achievements. You are educated, but you are also given to arrogance. Hence, I had to come to guide you. The mark of a true human being is not his knowledge, but his humility. Your Intellect, Your Education is of... NO USE IF IT... ONLY FEEDS YOUR EGO.
Swami Vishnudevananda wrote ‘MY YEARS WITH THE MASTER’ at http://www.sivanandaonline.org. about how he was brought to his knee and his ego trashed by Swami Sivananda of Rishikesh.
As if by chance, I had found a piece of paper that intrigued me. One night when I was working late and was searching for a misplaced paper, I found a small pamphlet in the trash basket. It was called ‘SADHANA TATTVA’ and was by Swami Sivananda of Rishikesh. As soon as I read it, my body began to shake. It began with ‘An ounce of practice is worth tons of theory.’ Here was a teacher who was down-to-earth and practical. There was nothing mysterious about his teachings; I felt that I had to meet him for myself. I got a few days' leave from the army. I was an arrogant boy on leave from the army. It meant that I had to travel a day and a night from my army base in Jullunder. I would have only a few hours at the Ashram - just to see the Master and then go right back.
The first time I saw Swami Sivananda he was sitting with about 30 or 40 people around him. He looked like an ordinary man among them. The look on his face and manner of speech was simple and straightforward. Each word came from his heart. There was no kind of religious hypocrisy, no sitting on a tiger skin with ashes smeared all over his body. He had an extraordinary spiritual glow.
The second time, I saw him Swami Sivananda was coming up the stairs in my direction. I didn't want to bow my head to him. I was young and arrogant and never wanted to bow my head to anybody-Swami, God-realised soul, or whoever, I didn't care. But it is the tradition in India that you should bow your head to a holy man. To avoid the situation I just moved out of his path.
The Master saw me and headed in my direction. He asked me who I was and where I was coming from. Then he bowed down and touched my feet!! My whole body began to shake violently. With all my heart, with all my life and love, I learned to bow without any type of reservation. He touched my heart not with miracles or shows of holiness, but with his perfect egoless nature. He didn't consider that I was just a stupid boy standing there, though I was just that. He touched my heart and broke my ego. That was my first lesson, and if I could attain one-millionth of the state of egolessness of the Master, it is His Grace.
Similarly, a story is told of a young monk who sets out to preach what he had been taught in the monastery. He encounters an old man who trashes his ego. The young monk after years of tutelage under his master finally was told by his master that he needed to leave the monastery to get to see the rest of the world. He was instructed to preach the teachings he had acquired at the monastery. The monk left the monastery that was his turf for years and came down the mountain. Upon reaching the plains, the young monk came across an old man chanting on a riverbank. The old man was chanting the exact mantra that the monk had mastered at the monastery. But it seemed different - with a slight variation. So he apprehended the old man telling him that he was going about the wrong way of reciting the mantra and taught the old man how it should be recited. The old man listened attentively and repeated it. The young monk was proud that he had passed on what he was taught at the monastery. He had found his first candidate to whom he had started to preach.
Now the young lad had to hire a boatman to take him across the river to the nearby village where he could continue preaching. About halfway through the journey across the river, the young monk noticed that the boatman had gone all pale and was looking over his (the monk) shoulder with his mouth wide open. The young monk turned around. What he saw shocked him too. The old man whom he had met at the riverbank was now standing beside the boat - on the surface of the water! The old man whispered to the lad that he had forgotten the mantra he was taught. He requested that the monk repeat it. The young monk who was pretty shaken up held the old man’s hand and asked for forgiveness for underestimating the power of his practice. He asked that he pardon him for being egoistic and arrogant and begged to be taken in as his disciple and be allowed to follow him back.
In a Nadi revelation, Agathiyar reveals the extent of humbleness in his student Bhogar. When Bhogar was asked what he knew by Agathiyar he kept replying that he knew nothing. When Agathiyar asked Bhogar if he knew Mother Goddess, Bhogar replied he did not know. When asked if he knew Lord Vishnu, he replied he did not know too. When Agathiyar asked if he knew Lord Muruga, again Bhogar to everyone's surprise answered "No". How could one who was behind the making and installation of Lord Muruga's statue at Palani not know him? When asked if he knew about the herbs that he had sought, collected, and done extensive research on, he replied in the negative. Bhogar had replied that he did not know to all the questions put forward by Agathiyar. This surprised all those gathered. Finally, when asked what he knew, Bhogar answered that he only knew the Holy Feet of his Guru, Agathiyar.
In the movie "Saguni" an enterprising youth asks a guru what his problem was contrary to the gurus asking devotees why they came. He had observed from afar that while the guru went rattling away, no one was listening to him. He proposes and sells the guru a plan to reverse the situation and get people to listen to him. In an attempt to repackage and market his wares, he asks the guru to remain silent henceforth. The guru got their attention finally. Now the same devotees were surprised at their guru's silence and begin to yearn to hear him speak.
Similarly, in this age where we speak as if we know everything, Lord Dhakshanamurthi too chose to zip up then. It is said that Lord Dhakshanamurthi would answer all the questions put forth by the four disciples of his. This went on for years and there seemed no end to questions. Finally, the Lord chose to remain quiet. Seeing their guru sitting still the devotees simply fell into a state of meditation. The Mouna guru teaches in silence. Bhagawan Ramana is said to do this too.
Man in wanting to exhibit his intelligence and knowledge to others tends to keep on speaking. He fails to understand that an empty vessel makes the most noise. From https://personalexcellence.co/blog/empty-vessels/ we learn to understand this proverb from the perspective of science, physics in particular.
Empty vessels are used in the analogy because, in physics, empty containers create louder noises than filled ones. If you take two empty glasses, fill one up with water, and then blow into both glasses, you’ll find that the empty glass creates a louder noise than the filled ones. That’s because the air column (i.e. the empty space) allows sound waves to pass through and bounce off the sides of the glass, which creates an amplified vibration.
As Swami Sivananda wrote "An ounce of practice is worth tons of theory", if only he shuts up, he shall begin to experience all this knowledge for himself rather than merely vomiting them out. Hence the idea in having us go within and contemplate on all our earlier learnings. Coming out of it though we see the mountain as a mountain again, we see it in a new perspective having had the experience of traversing it.
